In this week's episode, we put in a claim for global dominance. And then retract it through our words and actions.

Rob and Ben were both a little tired - see as such zippy dialogue flies directly into your ears:

"When it comes to marketing, I'm an aggressive marketer. And, I think I'm going to be aggressive with them [other internet Pondcasters] and say, 'Hey! Whaddya think? We want to take some of your market share away from you.'"

Mind-bending! BONG! Zeitgeist of 90s Channel 4 evoked! BONG! British Ethics Conundrum! BONG! Wholesale Shock and Awe Assault on Alternate Pondcasts! BONG!
The Real Across the Pondcast

1. November 25, 2008 at 4:34 pm

   Dear Sirs,

   We found your podcast hard work and thought that perhaps you hadn’t put a lot of effort into your interview technique. Perhaps you could have started in a more exciting fashion than simply saying ‘Hi…Guest.’? However, I loved the lively musicbed that you boys chose to represent your no nonsense attitude to gaming. Unfortunately, my cohost found it portentous. He would have wanted me to pass on that little bit of constructive criticism.

   We believe that we deserve a bit of your market share, being more entertaining and such [just to say], so perhaps you could do us the favour of giving us a shout out on your next atp podcast.

   Thank you,

   Yours ever valiantly,

   Across The Pondcast

   x o x o

Music featured in this episode:

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Matt Coldrick
"Crown Violet Selflessness" (mp3)
from "Music*For A Busy Head"
(Absolute Ambient)

Buy at iTunes Music Store
More On This Album

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School of Seven Bells
"Half Asleep" (mp3)
from "Alpinisms"
(Ghostly International)

Stream from Rhapsody
Buy at iTunes Pre-Release
More On This Album

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 Pageant of Inertia - Brushed Aside

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 Marching Band
"Gorgeous Behavior" (mp3)
from "Spark Large"
(U & L Records, Inc.)

Buy at iTunes Music Store
Stream from Rhapsody
More On This Album

The Heathrow Airport Livecast!

In this episode, Rob and Ben are finally reunited after a challenging five months spent in different continents. Will they still get on in-person? How will they cope with the pressure of having real, live, actual-factual fans present? What about the new technology they have to work with? When will it all end?

Also, you can expect to hear a slightly more ambient pondcast this time round. Ben's soul was so distraught at the thought of possibly ruining the first ever Live Pondcast that it made a metaphysical, audial attempt to express itself into the editing process.  

Highlights include:

Too much visual stimulus.
Ambient noise!
Genuine fan interaction.
World's oldest goth.
World's smallest tumbleweed.

This time round our intrepid correspondents are troubled by physics and matter and the way that those two impostors played themselves out in the historic event of the assasination of JFK, Rob has to pass a repatriation test, Ben unleashes his inner Bond villain and we have some of the least in-depth and relevant discussion on the upcoming US election currently available.

Don't miss the most mundane conversation to have ever taken place over a music bed of the Dallas theme tune! It's embarrassing.

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Don't you know? USA is the centre of Jerusalem.

Rob wanted you all to see this:

This time round, our correspondents are beginning to sound despondent about their lack of employment. You might think that would stop them from having a fun Pondcast, but they appear to be made of sterner stuff. A bumper-length, full-stereo episode which covers exactly where Rob has been freewheeling all this time, Ben indulges his ADHD, they both discuss their respective TV appearances and have a jolly nice chat. Special mention goes to guest correspondent and all round lovely person Anna McMullen for her contributions in the field of getting angry people to vent into a dictaphone.

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Keywords: Medicine Hat, Exposition, Vignette, Good For Your Soul, Chinese Buffet, Naval Authority, Generously Proportioned, Superhuman Powers, Early Onset, Rapid Downturn, Split-Throat.

 

Our first episode proper, and all is a little bit awry. The internet kept on dropping packets of data like breadcrumbs into the ocean which keeps us two friends apart. Every so often Rob sounds like a garbled mess of a man.

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This episode watch out for American Positivity Camp!, Rob's tips on how to avoid being sick, our views on the Olympics, plus a little spot on a terrifying creature you might find in the sea. Special points to anyone who can identify which anecdote had me fiddling around with the pitch-shifter for a laugh. Email us at pondcast@googlemail.com!

Much love,

Ben and Rob

Like our incidental music from the pilot episode, Rob is M.I.A. In his stead we have a very special treat for July. Simultaneously celebrating and mourning the fact that George W. Bush has only six months left in office, we've gone back in time and recorded an enjoyable audiobook of his favourite childhood story (released when he was twenty-three).

Our sort-of reader is a four-year-old version of Ben, ably-assisted by his Mum and slightly diva-ish little sister.

Hail to the Thief!

Intrepidly, we pilot our way across unchartered waters. Mainly ponds in Sheffield. But it's important to have a test run before we go all out travel pondcasting.

This is a very rough pondcast. We cover diverse issues ranging from rootsy, urban poetry to parental excuse poetry. I challenge Rob's advanced prude status. He challenges his microphone to continue operating whilst doused in tea. We have fun.

Also: What's Asterix the Gaul's problem? The Perils of Cheap Flight. Amateur Psychoanalysis. All this and much more...